…and unfortunately none so glorified as the mistranslations of Chinese into English. Hence the origin of the Engrish website. I know that many other languages have some horrible translations into English in their country of origin, and I know that with my wonderful grasp of Spanish, my translations into it would be even worse. Nevertheless, I have to give you a few samples of some of the funnier ones I have seen.

If ever in a Chinese library or bookstore, check out Bowling with Bilbo!

After recent events at work (which I will post shortly), I have to say this sign must definitely be posted at an office.

And here, they try and tell women not to have children after the age of 40. I wonder how many are over the age of 70?

In some Chinese buffets, I’ve wondered myself what I am eating. At least this one states in plainly.

And finally, I’ve been to some 4th of July fireworks events that really haven’t met any standards. Granted, ours we have almost annually are great, but others, I have definitely seen some of the ones shown below.

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…but even for me, this goes TOO far! How do these babies not get injured in this Indian ritual? I mean, really…throwing a baby 50 ft. to land on a sheet?

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…but really, I’m not. Ever since we got DSL, we drop net connectivity once in awhile. It’s a short bit of time, nothing major, but enough to make us lose our wireless connection throughout the house. So, once a week or so while I’m downstairs trying to ignore the horrible TV programming the wife watches, I’ll hop on the internet and the network autoconfig finds about six other families that it can connect to (and does for a short amount of time). First off, how can there be six families around me with a signal strength enough to get to our den (which is like a wireless network damper)? And why it autoconnects everytime when I’ve selected NOT TO, I have no clue. So, if the neighbors are like me and have software to track “intruders” on your network, they’ll probably see me pop up now and then. If neighbors are reading this….it’s purely by accident, I promise.

Anyway, this cartoon today from xkcd made me think of it…

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The Daily Mail, a web paper located in the United Kingdom, has reported that children are now less likely to have an injury from falling out of a tree, and the reason…more kids are playing video games than playing outside!

Seven years ago the chances were about equal. But as the lives of “the Xbox generation” have become dominated by sedentary activities, the likelihood of them having an outdoor accident has plummeted.

In 2006/07 – the latest year for which data is available – 1,067 children under 15 needed medical assistance for tree falls. In 1999/00 the figure was 1,823.

I don’t ever want to hear someone telling me I’m wasting my time by playing Lord of the Rings Online or the PlayStation. It’s just my form of self-preservation. I mean goodness, I could walk outside and sprain my ankle going down the driveway. It’s much safer sitting on my rear playing games…

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So it appears that Delta Airlines will start revamping the seating on their plans in 2010 to a new design increases comfort, promotes privacy and yet still gives more space than conventional airlines. It really is interesting to see how a few small changes can really make a difference in the total experience. I don’t fly that often, but I can tell you that if I did, this would be a must to keep me from getting seated next to the guy who should be in two seats because of his size.

The Cozy Suite via OhGizmo!

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I know that one of the things that separates humans from the animals is our ingenuity, but sometimes I wonder if it would be better if some people should be demoted to animal status and stripped of their human rights? I know that I have done some really unintelligent things in my time on this mortal coil, but never has something like this even crossed my mind.

Then again, it could just show what happens when you mix youth and beer.

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One of the guys I work with brought up during lunch today one of his trips to Atlanta, Georgia. He was talking about a restaurant called Mulligan’s where pretty much everything served was deep fried. But then, he reminded all of us about the “Hamdog”, truly the most unhealthy thing I have ever seen (but embarrassingly enough, looks tasty).

From their menu, the hamdog is a hot dog wrapped in a beef patty that’s deep fried, covered with chili, cheese and onions, and served on a hoagie bun topped with a fried egg and two fistfuls of fries. Mmmmm, tasty!

Unforunately, it seems that Mulligan’s has closed it doors, but let us all remember the hamdog!

And if you ever want to make your own, this website helps you to do just that!

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So, now that I have moved out of the great metropolis knows as Matthews, I rarely drive through it. As I passed by one day, I noticed a huge monstrosity. It appears that a developer, in an effort to maximize the use of his land, has created a ginormous wall out of retaining blocks. Someone needs to sit this developer down and have a nice little talk about aesthetics. For what he did, he could easily have tiered the wall and placed some kind of greenery between it to make it not look so much like a…well…wall. Anyway, I’m glad that in my career and at my job, we try our hardest to to make the structures look good as well as be functional. Later on down the road, I’ll have to post some pictures of these projects, but until then, enjoy the GREAT WALL OF MATTHEWS!

Click to make them bigger.

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I always love to follow the Darwin Awards. For some reason, it always makes me feel smarter than I actually am. I mean, really, who in their right mind would sit under that huge boulder? Granted, it may have been resting there for centuries, but just imagine if each day, one grain of sand is swept out from underneath the boulder. One of these days, that one special grain of sand will be gone and…SQUISH!

I feel sorry for those people if it ever happens, but at least that leaves more air for you and me!

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So, the past month has been a mad rush of fixing six bridges over I-95 that have been hit by several trucks. There we go, doing our good deed of preventing loss of life…sometimes it makes you feel good. I’m not sure how these bridges had such low vertical clearances, but now they should be good for quite awhile to come. Then again, there are people that just have no clue and no amount of vertical clearance is adequate.

Sometimes I would just like to investigate how much loss of capacity there is on these bridges. Reading the inspection reports stating that prestressing strands have been cut, large spalls of concrete, etc., it’s just amazing.

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